Why?? Why?? Why??

The time spent with you is gone, now moaning in tears shattered trying to find why you are not around???? Why don’t you talk to Me???? What was my mistake???? Waiting for you on threshold to see you coming , feeling excited when a vehicle stops nearby thinking you came , to hear you listen say ”BABY IM HOME” … waiting all day dreaming this to happen , I end up with my eyes numb , shutting the door really hard , getting back to the dinning table.. imagining you sitting their & praising the food…. Makes me feel so happy & humble, when out from the imagination seeing myself all alone  ..  once where smiles spilled ,love was made.. once where angle’s stayed… now there is only tears, silence & grief… the angle’s found some new place.. leaving  Me lone the way you did… are you happy seeing my tears???? Are you even aware how it feels???? Why this helplessness  ????  why I am all alone ???? tell me the way to find you???? Without you life has no meaning , no relationship seem true ,my world has turned black & blue, the only thing now I want is you!!!!!! Knowing that your not going to come back , my lonely heart feels burnt & disgraced for all the love shown making me think why am I still paying every second???? Why this emptiness ???? why the world seem bad???? Why every one in it seem so untrue???? Why am I loosing hope from love????  is this the way you wanted me to be???? Thinking about all this my day got ended… went to bed & found myself sleeping in a grave???? Once where in your arms sleep was  most desirable … now it seems so painful… all night spent crying.. my morning arises… & again the same routine… I will wait for you till the day you come back .. as same way as I did today